Rules for life.

This was origionally sent to me as a chain email. I never send them on, but I thought that they were good so I would pass then on this way.

There's some mighty fine advice in these words.

1. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
2. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.
3. Don't believe all you hear.
4. When you say, 'I love you,' mean it.
5. When you say, 'I'm sorry,' look the person in the eye.
6. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.
7. Believe in love at first sight.
8. Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much.
9. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.
10. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.
11. Don't judge people by their relatives.
12. Talk slowly but think quickly.
13. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, 'Why do you want to know?'
14. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
15. Say 'bless you' when you hear someone sneeze.
16. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.
17. Remember the three R's: 
1. Respect for self; 
2. Respect for others; and 
3. Responsibility for all your actions.
18. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
19. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
20. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice
21. And most important "Have some time alone."

:)

Breast Cancer Awareness on Facebook

OK so it is that time of year again, for women to put very strange status updates on Facebook.

In the past few years it has been.

What colour bra are you wearing?

Red

'I like it' followed by where do you usually leave your purse?

I like it on the kitchen table!

The size off your feet followed by inches and then an unhappy emoticon.

7 inches :(

Weeks and a craving!

I'm 13 weeks and craving Starburst!

This meme was a bit more complex in its construction than the previous two.
Women in on the joke are instructed to match the month of their birth with a corresponding number of weeks,
and the date of their birth with a type of candy or sweet, to get the "I'm X weeks and craving X!" construction.

So by following that formula, somebody's who says she's "13 weeks and craving Starburst" would have a birthday of Sept. 2.

Here's the full formula, in case you're wondering:

Month	Number of week
January	1 week
February	2 weeks
March	3 weeks
April	4 weeks
May	6 weeks
June	8 weeks
July	10 weeks
August	12 weeks
September	13 weeks
October	14 weeks
November	16 weeks
December	18 weeks

Date

1. Skittles
2. Starburst
3. Kit-Kats
4. M&M's
5. Galaxy
6. Crunchies
7. Dairy Milk
8. Lollipops
9. Peanut Butter Cups
10. Meat Balls
11. Twizzlers
12. Bubble Gum
13. Hershey's Kisses
14. Chocolate Mints
15. Twix
16. Resse's Fastbreak
17. Fudge
18. Cherry Jello
19. Milky Way
20. Pickles
21. Creme Eggs
22. Skittles
23. Gummy Bears
24. Gummy Worms
25. Strawberry Pop Tarts
26. Starburst
27. Mini Eggs
28. Kit-Kat Chunkies
29. Double Chocolate Chip Crunchy Cookies
30. Smarties
31. Chocolate Cake

Now for the next one, again it is for birthdays

The idea is to use you birthdate, month and day only, no year!

Write: "I am going to live in (see city or country for your birthday month below) for (day of your birthday) it would be how many months you are going

Ex. if your birthday was on February 14th, then
" I am going to live in London for 14 months!!!!

Month	Place
January	Mexico
February	London
March	Miami
April	Dominican Republic
May	France
June	St. Petersburg
July	Austria
August	Germany
September	New York
October	Amsterdam
November	Las Vegas
December	Colombia

And remember women.

Don't tell the men!

Happy Birthday to Me!

It's my birthday and I will cry if I want to.

Here is a list of things that make you feel old. So, how far down can you go?
Please remember that this was jotted down in 2011, so you will need to add more years to it now.

1. Face book is about 7 years old.
2. Pierce Brosnan last acted as James Bond 9 years ago.
3. Windows XP was released 10 years ago, in 2001. And it's been 10 years since 9/11.
4. The "new" millennium is more that a decade old.
5. "The Matrix" came out 12 years ago, Keanu Reeves is 46.
6. Mother Theresa and Lady Diana have been dead for 14 years. The same year the first "Harry Potter" book first came out.
7. Spice Girls début single "Wannabe" cane out in 1996, 15 years ago. The youngest of them is 35.
8. The first season of F.R.I.E.N.D.S. first aired 17 years ago.
9. Jurassic Park (1993) is older that Justin Bieber
10. "Terminator 2" is 20 years old (1991), Edward Furlong who played John Connor is 33.
11. Macaulay Culkin (30) was in "Home Alone", 21 years ago.
12. Sean Connery last played James Bond in 1983 that is 28 years ago. and he is now 80 years old.
13. The first space shuttle flight on 12^th April 1981, now that is just over 30 years ago (Starting to feel old!)
14. Space Invaders Launches Craze for Computer Video Games in 1978.
15. 11 Israel Athletes murdered by Arab Gunman at Munich Olympics on September 6^th 1972.
16. Apollo 11 the first manned mission to the moon 1969, 42 years ago.
17. Assassination of John F. Kennedy in 1963, 48 years.
18. Munich air disaster on February 6^th 1958 - 21 dead, including 7 Manchester United Players
19. In 1954, rationing finally ends in Great Britain, the first sub 4 minute mile run by Roger Bannister and hydrogen bomb test were conducted on Bikini Atoll in the Pacific Ocean.
20. Queen Elizabeth II crowned queen of England on June 2^nd 1953.

P.S. Do you remember some of the kids now posting on Facebook, in there nappies!

Ok so now you have worked out how old you are think of your next 'mile stone' birthday, 20, 30, 40 etc.

So now take that 'mile stone' birthday and first times it by 2 and then the 'mile stone' birthday by 3, if you are 20 that will give you 40 and 60.

Now ask will I be alive at that birthday.

Age at next milestone	Milestone X 2	Milestone X 3
20	40 - Yes	60 - Should be
30	60 - Should be	90 - Possibly
40	80 - Possibly	120 - Don't think so.
50	100 - Well some people are!
60	120 - Very un-lightly
70	Don't even bother

If you want to know the average age life expectancy have a look at Wikipedia.

Ok, so I am 50 today. I have lived at least half my life. I am having a good life, I hate the phrase "You have had a good life", this suggests that you are at the end. and I don't want it to end.

And more importantly life is what you make it.

When I die the world will end. This is a fact for me.
To everyone else it will just be another mark in time.

And people wonder why I think birthdays are depressing. It is just a way to mark another step closer to the grave.

When it does end and I am in a box .:-

I want to people to come into to see me off with Bach Toccata and Fugue in D minor playing in the background, and it MUST be played on an organ, nothing else can get the full range.

When I leave the ‘Always look on the bright side of life’ from the film ‘Life of Brian’ must be played.

Just remember.

Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "holy shit... what a ride! Can I have another go?"

CSS Hacks and why you should not use them

CSS Hacks - I know I got most of this some where else but it is so right

Every one should keep CSS Simple

KISS

Do they? Not so. The complexity monster has reappeared, right in the center of modern Web development. Nowadays it doesn’t manifest itself as an endlessly nested table, but as an endlessly complicated CSS hack.

Our beloved CSS is in danger.

The lure of CSS hacks

Otherwise sensible Web developers wasted enormous amounts of time in finding and improving countless CSS hacks. In my opinion these hacks are a danger to Web development, both from a psychological and from a technical point of view.

Complicated CSS hacks are the modern equivalents of the frames and tables we used in wholesale lots back in the nineties. Their use serves to give the Web author a feeling of mastery, a false sense of security in the face of the countless things that can go wrong in browsers.

As a bonus, complex CSS hacks look great on mailing lists:

Five pixels too many in IE 5.5 Win2000 SP1.1beta? Use Funny Fred’s Hilarious Replaced Right-Bracket Hack!

Such mails are meant to dazzle the newbies and to prove that the author really knows what he’s talking about.

What bothers me most about the mindset of CSS hackers is that they are actively searching for complicated solutions. Seek and ye shall be found, if you want complexity it’ll take you by the throat. It’ll never let go of you, and it won’t help you, either.

The Web is an uncertain place. You’ll never be sure that your Web sites will work in the exact way you want them to work, not even when you apply all modern insights from CSS, accessibility and usability. Instead of seeking false comfort in hacks that seem all the more comfortable because of their complexity, you should accept uncertainty as a basic principle.

Browsers don’t have perfect CSS support; especially for people who’ve just started learning CSS, that can be infuriating. Nonetheless CSS hacks are not the solution. Acceptance of the way the Web currently works is the best way to go because it’ll keep your sites simple.

The dangers of CSS hacks
Besides, CSS hacks are actively dangerous for your Web site. A cursory glance at the underlying "theory" (if one can call it that) will rapidly convince you that the average CSS hacker doesn’t have the faintest idea what he’s doing.

A certain browser has a certain CSS bug. Good to know. This same browser has another bug, usually in its parsing of CSS selectors or comments. This, too, is important information. However, a CSS hacker proceeds to use the second bug to "solve" the first one.

Solving one bug by another is not my idea of keeping Web development simple, but the matter goes beyond bad coding style. These hacks are inherently unsafe.

In an ideal world the next release of the browser would solve both bugs. In an uncaring world the next release of the browser would solve neither. In the uncertain world we live in the next release could solve one bug but not the other!

Therefore you could end up with a hack that applies an extra rule you no longer need, or with a necessary extra rule that isn’t applied any more.

CSS hackers seek out pairs of complicated, transitory browser bugs and confidently assume that new browser versions will never solve exactly one of two paired bugs. Then they deliberately sprinkle these bugs through the Web sites they code.

The worst part is that they seduce innocent newbies into copying their reprehensible habits by falsely promising them mastery over Web browsers.

I find their behavior very unprofessional and irresponsible. It’s not forward-compatible Web development. It’s not backward-compatible, either. It’s completely incompatible Web development, and future users of their sites will pay the price.

Using CSS hacks responsibly

Deep in my heart I do not wish to apply any CSS hack. More often than not, though, when I create a site one browser proudly displays a bug. On encountering such a bug I first wonder whether it is acceptable. Does the 10px width difference really matter?

When the bug isn’t acceptable, I always look for real CSS solutions first, solutions that do not involve hacking my way through browser land.

Hacks against dead browsers are safe, but hacks against the living aren’t. None of them. Ever.

We should not use CSS hacks except for those targeted at dead browsers, and even these with caution and only as a last resort.

CSS hacks lull Web developers into a false sense of security and into pride at the complexity of their solutions, while the underlying theory predicts long-term disaster. Don’t fall for these aberrations.

Keep CSS simple.

Hospital

I know I said my next post would be about hospital but that was a long time ago and I really don't want to talk about it.

Care was good, Food was bad.

The Bike Accident 11th Feb 2011

Ok, so here it is the lead up to the accident. This might sound a bit like a police report, and that is because some of it is.

On Friday 11^th Feb 2011, I was traveling home from work on the A361 from Beckington towards Southwick. I travelled through most of Rode passing Church Fields on the left hand side. The two cars in front indicated to turn left onto the B3109, and then turned as indicated.

As I was moving across the junction a white transit van, pulled out of the junction. It was turning right to travel towards Beckington. There was no time for me to be able to avoid the van.

The front of the van hit me on the left hand side, crushing my left leg between the bike and the front of the van. I was thrown off my bike. I rolled along the road, finally stopping on the wrong side of the road alongside the bike (about 2 meters away from the bike).

The bike slid along the road on its right hand side and stopped on the grass verge.

I thought about getting up but looking at my leg and the pain I was in I decided not to move.

So here is a diagram.

Key Road from bottom left to top right is A361 Road from top down is B3109 Dotted white line is path of van Dotted blue line is path of bike Dotted red line is my path after leaving the bike.

A number of people stopped (including the driver of the white van,) and gave assistance.

During the time waiting for the police and ambulance the driver of the white van came up to me, asked how I was and said the classic; ‘sorry I did not see you’

Whilst waiting for the police and ambulance I was able to phone Emma  and Deb and inform them of what had happened.

Within a few minutes uniformed police arrived and an ambulance followed soon after.

So what of the bike?

So here is a before. This was back in June just after I had put it back on the road after it had been SORN'ed for a years.

And here it is after. These pictures were taken by a friend who works where the bike was taken.

I know it had a strange colour scheme, this is what it looked like when I bought it. But I liked it.

Next will be the hospital

Bikes And Me

So I am now into the second week away from my bike accident.

It was the classic 'SMIDNSY' or 'Sorry mate I did not see you'.

I thought I would start this with the bikes I have owned and have ridden.

Only one of these pictures is mine the rest are from trawling the internet.

1 Yamaha FS1E.

I will start with this I shared with a mate of mine. We carried out some modifications on it and we were able to get almost 70 MPH out of it. I would not tick over. Must have had it for only about a year. It looked to be in about the same condition as this picture.

2 Suzuki TS 100ERN

This was the first proper bike I had. It was bought with some inherentance money and I got it from new. It was a good reliable bike. Not fast and there was very little I could do to speed it up. I had it for 4 years, in it's time it has been stolen when I was in Manchester and almost ruined. Finally was stolen when I parked it up in a lay-by after running out of petrol. Never to be seen again.

3 Honda XL 250 S

Loved that one. I had it nicked when I was in Manchester. It was found a few years later in good condition, but I could not afford to purchase it back from the insurance company. I only had this for a few months.

4 Yamaha RD 200

The yellow peril. Sort of reliable, a nice bit of fun, not too fast. Three years of fun driving.

5 Kawasaki KH750

Now this was fun, in much the same way as an adventure park can be fun but with out the safety features. Its nick name is ‘The Widow Maker’ for obvious reasons. Top speed of some where near 130 mph in a straight line. That was the problem it's handling round bends had a lot to be desired. It needed some work to get it up to a decent condition. I bought it for £100 (in poor condition) and sold it for £400, in not much better condition a few months later.

6 Honda XL 600 V Transalp

Well this is what it should have looked like. However it's colour scheme was something different. 

I admit I bought it looking like this.

This was the bike that has just been in the accident. It was a good bike, Yes it had a few problems, which I fixed and put it back on the road late last year. I bought it in 1998, so I had it for 13 years. There were times I was using it to get to work in Bournmouth, that was a round trip of 120 miles per day.

There were a number of other bikes that I borrowed from friends at different times.

Suzuki ZN85

This was a 650 turbo. You had to be careful with this one. To overtake you usually did the following

• Look 
• Signal
• Twist the grip to accelerate
• Move round vehicle in front

However if you did this you would not have time to move round the vehicle in front. The turbo cut in so quick more that one rider was found stuck to the back of a lorry instead of overtaking it.

Suzuki GS 850

Lovely bike. Belonged to a friend of mine who died of cancer a couple of years ago.

To the future

What do I want next. Not really sure, but something like this

Kawasaki KLZ 250

So answer every one. Yes I will get a other bike at some time. Don't think it will be this year though.

Lie Back and Think of England (NSFW Well just about)

And hot on the band wagon of the souvineers to celebrate the wedding of Prince William of Wales to Ms. Catherine Elizabeth Middleton, we now have Crown Jewels condoms of distinction.

Save The BBC Websites

At the end of Janurary the BBC announced that it would be axing over 170 of its top level directories and everything under them.

See list below.

When I say axing I mean deleting it all.

This reminds me of the practices in the 60's and 70's where they taped over recordings of programs like "Dr Who".

Or is this deletion more like the burning of the library in Alexandria!!

This action is supposed to produce a 'significant' cost saving. Since most of these sites have been mothballed it is hard to see how this will be achieved.

If you want a strong and independent BBC then make your feelings known to your local MP and directly to Jeremy 'Cunt' Hunt, Secretary of State for Culture, Olympics, Media and Sport. You may also wish to contact Mark Thompson (BBC Director General) and the BBC Trust your desire to see a stronger BBC position in negotiations with the government around the cuts to the BBC's funding.

PS: You may also find these interesting as well

Adactio is the online home of Jeremy Keith.

currybetdotnet Martin Belam's blog about user experience, information architecture, journalism and digital media.

853 by Darryl, a journalist and online media type living in Charlton, south-east London

Web site for deletion.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/80faiths
http://www.bbc.co.uk/abolition
http://www.bbc.co.uk/africabeyond
http://www.bbc.co.uk/amazingmrspritchard
http://www.bbc.co.uk/animalrescuelive
http://www.bbc.co.uk/antiques
http://www.bbc.co.uk/atlantic
http://www.bbc.co.uk/atwork
http://www.bbc.co.uk/backpage
http://www.bbc.co.uk/barefacts
http://www.bbc.co.uk/beauty
http://www.bbc.co.uk/bigfinish
http://www.bbc.co.uk/biggerpicture
http://www.bbc.co.uk/bigtoe
http://www.bbc.co.uk/blast
http://www.bbc.co.uk/bloom
http://www.bbc.co.uk/blueprint
http://www.bbc.co.uk/bonekickers
http://www.bbc.co.uk/bornsurvivors
http://www.bbc.co.uk/borntowin
http://www.bbc.co.uk/britain
http://www.bbc.co.uk/britishfashion
http://www.bbc.co.uk/britishfilm
http://www.bbc.co.uk/britishstylegenius
http://www.bbc.co.uk/celebdaq
http://www.bbc.co.uk/chatguide
http://www.bbc.co.uk/chinesefoodmadeeasy
http://www.bbc.co.uk/cityspace
http://www.bbc.co.uk/clone
http://www.bbc.co.uk/collective
http://www.bbc.co.uk/comeandhaveago
http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedymap
http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedyshuffle
http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedysoup
http://www.bbc.co.uk/communicate
http://www.bbc.co.uk/composers
http://www.bbc.co.uk/concertfordiana
http://www.bbc.co.uk/crimewatchroadshow
http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult
http://www.bbc.co.uk/dancingonwheels
http://www.bbc.co.uk/dannywallace
http://www.bbc.co.uk/desktopmcenroe
http://www.bbc.co.uk/displayoptions
http://www.bbc.co.uk/dropzone
http://www.bbc.co.uk/earthexplorers
http://www.bbc.co.uk/eastmidlandstoday
http://www.bbc.co.uk/electricdreams
http://www.bbc.co.uk/endofstory
http://www.bbc.co.uk/falconbeach
http://www.bbc.co.uk/fameacademy
http://www.bbc.co.uk/feedfactory
http://www.bbc.co.uk/filmfestival
http://www.bbc.co.uk/fmtchristmascard
http://www.bbc.co.uk/footballacademy
http://www.bbc.co.uk/genius
http://www.bbc.co.uk/greatbritishjourneys
http://www.bbc.co.uk/hardchristmas
http://www.bbc.co.uk/hardspell
http://www.bbc.co.uk/holiday
http://www.bbc.co.uk/horneandcorden
http://www.bbc.co.uk/ictcoach
http://www.bbc.co.uk/indianfoodmadeeasy
http://www.bbc.co.uk/indiapakistan
http://www.bbc.co.uk/intheknow
http://www.bbc.co.uk/joseph
http://www.bbc.co.uk/juniorfootball
http://www.bbc.co.uk/justthetwoofus
http://www.bbc.co.uk/keyskills
http://www.bbc.co.uk/labrats
http://www.bbc.co.uk/ladies
http://www.bbc.co.uk/lastchoirstanding
http://www.bbc.co.uk/lastmanstanding
http://www.bbc.co.uk/lastmillionaire
http://www.bbc.co.uk/latitude
http://www.bbc.co.uk/learningdevelopment
http://www.bbc.co.uk/learningoverview
http://www.bbc.co.uk/letsdance
http://www.bbc.co.uk/lifegivers
http://www.bbc.co.uk/lifeonmars
http://www.bbc.co.uk/lilyallen
http://www.bbc.co.uk/littledorrit
http://www.bbc.co.uk/liveearth
http://www.bbc.co.uk/longwaydown
http://www.bbc.co.uk/lookeast
http://www.bbc.co.uk/looknorth
http://www.bbc.co.uk/looknorthhull
http://www.bbc.co.uk/looknorthnecumbria
http://www.bbc.co.uk/looknorthyorkslincs
http://www.bbc.co.uk/maria
http://www.bbc.co.uk/massive
http://www.bbc.co.uk/mediacenter
http://www.bbc.co.uk/midlandstoday
http://www.bbc.co.uk/mischief
http://www.bbc.co.uk/missingmodel
http://www.bbc.co.uk/mistresses
http://www.bbc.co.uk/mountain
http://www.bbc.co.uk/movelikemichaeljackson
http://www.bbc.co.uk/movies
http://www.bbc.co.uk/murdermostfamous
http://www.bbc.co.uk/mysciencefictionlife
http://www.bbc.co.uk/nationonfilm
http://www.bbc.co.uk/naturesgreatevents
http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsa
http://www.bbc.co.uk/nohome
http://www.bbc.co.uk/northwesttonight
http://www.bbc.co.uk/oceans
http://www.bbc.co.uk/oliver
http://www.bbc.co.uk/otr
http://www.bbc.co.uk/palin
http://www.bbc.co.uk/parentsoftheband
http://www.bbc.co.uk/pdanews
http://www.bbc.co.uk/peoplesquiz
http://www.bbc.co.uk/personalaffairs
http://www.bbc.co.uk/photography
http://www.bbc.co.uk/pinball
http://www.bbc.co.uk/pointswest
http://www.bbc.co.uk/politics97
http://www.bbc.co.uk/print
http://www.bbc.co.uk/readingandleeds
http://www.bbc.co.uk/realhustle
http://www.bbc.co.uk/relationships
http://www.bbc.co.uk/remembrance
http://www.bbc.co.uk/robertburns
http://www.bbc.co.uk/robinhood
http://www.bbc.co.uk/rugbyacademy
http://www.bbc.co.uk/schoolradio
http://www.bbc.co.uk/scissorhands
http://www.bbc.co.uk/signsoflife
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sitcom
http://www.bbc.co.uk/solarsystem
http://www.bbc.co.uk/southeasttoday
http://www.bbc.co.uk/southtoday
http://www.bbc.co.uk/speaker
http://www.bbc.co.uk/spookscode9
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sportsummit
http://www.bbc.co.uk/spotlight
http://www.bbc.co.uk/streetdoctor
http://www.bbc.co.uk/strictlydancefever
http://www.bbc.co.uk/summerofbritishfilm
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sundaylife
http://www.bbc.co.uk/switch
http://www.bbc.co.uk/tattonpark
http://www.bbc.co.uk/tellinglives
http://www.bbc.co.uk/tess
http://www.bbc.co.uk/testthenation
http://www.bbc.co.uk/theoneandonly
http://www.bbc.co.uk/thepassion
http://www.bbc.co.uk/thewall
http://www.bbc.co.uk/thread
http://www.bbc.co.uk/thrillseeker
http://www.bbc.co.uk/travelmon
http://www.bbc.co.uk/trexxandflipside
http://www.bbc.co.uk/tribe
http://www.bbc.co.uk/truthaboutcrime
http://www.bbc.co.uk/tvarchivetrial
http://www.bbc.co.uk/tvmoments
http://www.bbc.co.uk/underdogshow
http://www.bbc.co.uk/upstaged
http://www.bbc.co.uk/videogaiden
http://www.bbc.co.uk/villagesos
http://www.bbc.co.uk/voices
http://www.bbc.co.uk/wannabes
http://www.bbc.co.uk/whenwillibefamous
http://www.bbc.co.uk/white
http://www.bbc.co.uk/widgets
http://www.bbc.co.uk/wildaboutyourgarden
http://www.bbc.co.uk/wma
http://www.bbc.co.uk/worldclass
http://www.bbc.co.uk/wrongdoor
http://www.bbc.co.uk/ww2peopleswar
http://www.bbc.co.uk/yourcountryneedsyou
http://www.bbc.co.uk/zombies

Friday Fun - Saving time

In this video are a number of time saving tips.

I am sure that setting some of the tips up takes longer than the time you would save.

Enjoy.

Tuesday Tech - How Facebook Ships Code

This is very techy and sad.

I am very interested in the mechanics of how Facebook works. With over 500 million (500,000,000) active users and over 50% of then logging on in a day they are big.

I think the last stats the I saw is that they had over 60,000 server with about 2000 staff.

The blog from Yee Lee give a nice bit of info.

Basic Training For The Recall

In this article I'm covering the basic training for the recall.  I'm assuming that you have a dog or a puppy that hasn't yet been trained to come to call and doesn't have any serious problems.

Before you start
When your dog is running about enjoying himself and you call him he has to do several things.

• He must stop his current activity no matter how interesting it is.
• He must turn in your direction and look for you.
• He must make the decision to come to you rather than do anything else.

You need to understand that this is going to be a big and difficult thing for a puppy to do and also for a dog that's never been trained.  You won't get perfection all at once and you need to have patience and plenty of treats.  If your dog likes squeaky toys then all the better.  These are ideal for getting a dog's attention when it is some distance away from you.

Let's do the first lesson
If your dog doesn't come when called then you must start training in a safe place.  The garden is a good idea or if it's raining you can start the training indoors.  All you need to do the first time is show your dog a titbit, move backwards a little way and encourage him to come to you.  Give him a titbit and praise and do it again. Once he's got the idea that coming to you is a good thing you can start to say "Fido come" in an encouraging voice and give praise and reward when he comes to you.  Don't expect him to come from any great distance at this early stage.

Moving On to the next stage
The trick with starting the recall is to watch your dog and choose a time to call when the dog is most likely to come.  If the dog is hell bent on chasing next door's cat you are unlikely to succeed by calling his name when he's in full chase.  If you do try and recall him he'll simply ignore you and he'll learn that he doesn't have to come to you when you use his name and say "Come."

When your dog is coming to you from a short distance then you can start to practice the recall while he's ambling about in the garden.  All you need to do is to wait until the dog has settled down a bit and is facing in your direction if possible.  Then squeak the toy to get his attention.  If the dog looks up at you then you can call his name and say "Come."  Be encouraging and as soon as the dog reaches you touch his collar or get hold of it. At the same time give a titbit and praise "What a good dog."   Then let go of the collar and let the dog wander off again.  Repeat this a few times and then have a game.  You can do this indoors as well from time to time just to reinforce the lesson.

Well done.  Your dog is learning to come to you already and he's mastering the third item in our list which is to come to you rather than do something else.

Let's take it further
When you're sure that your dog understands what you mean by "Fido come" you can take the training a bit further.  Once again you can use the garden for training, but this time you're going to call your dog when he's facing away from you.  Use the squeaky toy to get his attention and call him.  Don't forget to sound encouraging and have some really tasty titbits.  Each time your dog responds you must touch the collar or get hold of it as well as giving the praise and the titbit.  This is a vital part of training the recall and yet very few trainers seem to include this in their lesson.  The reason it's so important is that some dogs will come beautifully to call and then run off again before you can get hold of the collar.

If you're having trouble getting your dog to come to you, you can use a lead.  Get the dog to face you on the lead and then run backwards.  Call the dog's name  "Fido come," and praise and reward.
Alternatively you can make a complete fool of yourself by making a high pitched squeaking noise and running in the opposite direction.  Not many dogs can resist this and sooner or later they will want to join in the game.

Out in the park
When you are confident that your dog is coming to you and knows what you want it's time to try it in an open space away from home.  You will need a long lead to start with so that you can practice your recalls in complete safety.  Only When you are confident that your dog is not going to run off and disappear can you let him off the lead in a public place.

Let the dog have a run round on the long lead and let him get all his sniffing done.  Once he's settled down a bit call him in to you.  Use the long lead if necessary and use the running backwards technique.  Give a titbit and praise as soon as he comes to you and don't forget to get hold of the collar.

Sooner or later the time will come when you feel it's safe to let your dog off the lead.  A lot of dogs race away when the lead is unclipped but usually they stay within calling distance and will keep an eye on you to make sure you haven't disappeared.  You can practice your recalls when your dog has finished the initial race around and has had a good old sniff.  If he doesn't come straight away run in the opposite direction and use a high silly voice to get his attention.  When he comes back don't grab him and put him on the lead but do catch hold of the collar and give your praise and reward.  Let him go again and repeat the recall from time to time.

One thing to remember is that you should NEVER, NEVER scold your dog if he's been tardy in coming to you but has eventually responded to your call.  If you are angry with him when he comes to you he'll be even less inclined to come the next time as he'll be expecting to be told off.

If your dog is having a high old time with other dogs or is otherwise engaged then don't try to recall if you think he won't respond.  You need to catch the moment when he looks at you or stops what he's doing.  You're much more likely to get a recall and you won't have given your dog the idea that it's OK to ignore you.